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Seven Tips to Develop the Art of Apologizing

December 04, 2011  by: Paulose  Points: 20   Category: Others    Views: 762

Saying a few words of apology begins the process of healing hurt hearts. It restores relationships. It removes the dark marks of resentment.


Apology is never a sign of weakness. Rather it heals hearts that have been hurt and restores wounded relationships. Saying, "I am sorry" may seem to be simple; but when there is too much pride or one cannot take the risk that their apology will be flatly rejected may become extremely difficult.

Without an apology, the wounded person carries resentment and, while it may dissipate with time, most likely it will never be completely released. Just a few words of regret, sincerely offered will be an emotional control that can prevent a huge damage. They can prevent a wound from festering and becoming larger until the breach becomes insurmountable.

Here are 7 tips to practice apologizing

1) Appreciate the benefits

Expressing an apology gives enormous benefits to both the receiver and the apologizer. The receiver is healed from his emotional wound. He no longer perceives the wrongdoer as a personal threat.
The offender also has an opportunity to respond with forgiveness from the offended. He is freed from the guilt of remorse when he apologizes.
Offending persons who apologize can remain connected with their friends and colleagues without creating any distance.

2) Accept responsibilities

Pride goes before destruction. Humility through apology protects a person from fall. When one accepts responsibility in words or deeds it fosters up relationships through that act of humility.

3) Repairing in the same way

When some one is offended publicly he has to be apologized publicly. As far as possible, repair damage in the same way as it was done.

4) Sometimes face to face apologizing may be necessary

Generally, a simple 'I am sorry' may be enough. However, when the mistake is more serious, personal words of remorse must be reinforced with a face to face explanation or a short note to the concerned person.

5) Listen respectfully

Do not forget that when you apologize the other person may get upset. Give respect to his/her sentiment and allow the person to express the disappointment or frustration. Listen carefully. Never minimize their feelings by blurting out. Do not say or think he/she is making a mountain of a molehill. Acknowledge the offended person's feelings by saying a 'sorry'.

6) Give time after apology

After your apology, just wait for some time. Let things take some time to settle. The person offended by you may not be healed by just hearing your word of being sorry. It may take some time to experience his healing.

7) Do some concrete actions

When you offend somebody, healing and reconciliation can greatly be enhanced by doing some concrete actions. We have seen in history great persons seeking apology in public after many years by demonstrating their apology through concrete actions.

In apologizing you lose nothing, but gain a lot. Most likely, the person you have offended will accept you graciously. As a result, anger will be dissolved, hurt pride will be healed and a wounded heart will find great solace!



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